BJH: Thank you for agreeing to be interviewed, tell me a little about yourself?
Pin # 0098: Hi, I agreed to this interview because I feel I can represent any Baltimore woman experiencing infertility. I want to say to the community, you know me, you’ve seen me, I’m one of you, but inside I have a deep dark secret. My husband and I are going through infertility – something that no one who hasn’t gone through can understand. I wake up in the morning, go to work, do my shopping, like all of you, but underneath the exterior is my broken heart; a heart bleeding for the opportunity to be a mother, a soul yearning for the chance to nourish and nurture. I meet you every day and look like everyone else, but deep inside I’m crying. Hot salty tears course my heart. I hold them inside so you won’t know my secret.
In public I always scan the crowd to see if people see through my facade of normalcy. I feel so scared. So afraid. So isolated. When I’m with friends and they talk about sleepless nights, tuition stresses, Erev Yom Tov, I want to scream and yell, I want to tell all of them that I also have sleepless nights, just not from my baby! Late at night, I shed tears for what the Dr. will tell me next. I don’t have tuition stresses, but my bills for Doctors visits, medication, and treatments far surpass your children’s tuition. Erev Y”T I’m not busy running around shopping, instead I’m trying to arrange my treatment schedule so it shouldn’t come out on Y”T. But I don’t say anything, I just sit listening, smiling, nodding and silent…
BJH: This year’s campaign theme for Bonei Olam is Shhhh, from painfully quiet to a soothing whisper. How does this theme resonate with you?
Pin # 0098: Recently, Bonei Olam approved me for funding to try a treatment I never thought I would be able to afford. Hopefully, this treatment will result in the answer to my years of prayer. Knowing Bonei Olam is funding this treatment not only gives me hope of becoming a mother, I feel as if the community is there giving me chizuk as well. I know the money comes from people in the community. I want to shout out through my tears to each and every one of you, you cannot imagine how much chizuk and comfort you give me at this moment! But no, I must remain silent. Now I have hope, hope that my painful silence will soon be replaced with all the joyful sounds of parenthood.
BJH: You are only one of many cases Bonei Olam Baltimore is currently handling, what would you like to say to those in the Baltimore community?
Pin # 0098: During these challenging times for Klal Yisroel we each have the ability to participate in ensuring the continuity of generations by donating to Bonei Olam and assisting couples in Baltimore longing to have a family of their own. My journey would not be possible without the generosity of those in the Baltimore community. I’m sure I speak on behalf of the other Baltimore Bonei Olam couples is working with, when I say, thank you for your generosity and for hearing our silent cries of pain.
BJH: Thank you for sharing your story! Baltimore, you can help change the painful quiet to a soothing whisper by donating to the Bonei Olam online campaign, this Sunday and Monday, November 10th and 11th. Donate now at boneiolam.org/baltimore. All funds raised through this campaign will assist our local Baltimore couples. May we share good news together.
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